Pushing and Pulling

This week, I've decided to stop just saying I'm going to push myself to grow. I'm actually applying what I know is important and I'm seeing a difference. Sometimes it is as simple as sticking to the schedule I decide for myself in the morning.

I've been working on new creative ideas for video and motion; things that I never had the time to try when I was making three or four videos in three or four days with a two, three or four day deadline. When I was in that environment (where more times than not the negative feedback for a video I received from my employer was "It doesn't feel right. It needs to feel right, but I won't know how that feels until I see it and it works.")* I developed a hesitance to try things that I knew would take longer to learn, get right, fix or create because I was working with such tight turn-around times and under such ambiguous direction. I still loved every minute of creating in that environment (and I believe that environment ultimately made me better, more decisive and more efficient), but there was always an awareness that what I was creating was not the best I could do because of that hesitance.

I have decided to push that out of the way and it has opened up a whole new realm of creativity. I used to think, "If only I had this new effect plug-in, or 3D software, or a faster processor, my videos would be better." While those things help tremendously, when it comes down to it, the editor/artist/designer/creator is what makes all those things work together. It's kind of like music. I know of a lot of people who have very nice, expensive gear and guitars, but they don't know how to play more than three chords. That gear is not going to make them better unless they learn more chords, scales and technique.

There are a lot of less-than-ideal life-situations I am dealing with now, but I have been living with an optimistic expectance that my hope is not in my circumstances. This fact applies to this blog because if I did not hold fast to Jesus in all things, I would most likely hide in my bed all day and wouldn't care about improving, creating or doing much of anything. I am thankful for all the reasons I have to get out of bed every day. Here is a small list:

My God who loves me unconditionally
My amazing and beautiful wife
My family (extended and in-law)
My church family
Close friends
Art
Music
Freedom

*In fairness to my former employer, I received a lot of positive feedback regarding what I was producing and had the opportunity to learn an immense amount during that time.